would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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