You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize
