The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
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