Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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