He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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