WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
