I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize