girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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