Buhtt sex?
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
Randomize
