I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
