I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize
