If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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