Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
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Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
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