Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
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