The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize