Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Randomize
