He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize
