btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
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