im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
On my way home I saw a car that had "MOVE OVER PLZ" emblazoned across the windshield backwards, so people could see it in their rearview mirror
If I ever drive for Lyft or Uber I'm definitely gonna do that
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