everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
is it fun? or sober?
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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