dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Randomize
