We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
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