Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
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