drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
so much tequila, so little girl.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Randomize
