How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
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