It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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