He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
well you can't waste a boner
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Randomize