ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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