Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
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