dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
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