so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize
