i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
