It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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