You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize
