The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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