Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
this hospital has no fireball
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Randomize
