Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
