I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Randomize
