hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
