I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
