This girl is more easily done than said...
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize
