i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
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