There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
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