I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Randomize