6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
