remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Don't EVER smell your tampon
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Randomize
