I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
She told me I should be a condom model.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Randomize