So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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