The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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