So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
